What effects do the adult children of alcoholics experience?

A Challenging Journey

Adult children of alcoholics (ACOA) suffer from a wide range of negative effects because of their disrupted family backgrounds, including a fourfold increase in the likelihood of becoming alcoholics themselves, higher rates of mental disorders, higher rates of marrying into alcoholic families, and higher rates of becoming separated or divorced from their spouses. Typical ACOA tendencies can affect critical elements of life, including romantic relationships, parenting style, career goals, and finances.

Trust and security, two necessities for successful long-term relationships, do not come easily for many ACOAs, who grew up in insecure homes and may choose to isolate themselves from others. In addition, because many alcoholic parents were often more preoccupied with drinking than with caring for their children, ACOAs often have a strong need for affection, which can manifest itself as possessiveness, jealousy, and oversensitivity. The strong desire to be loved can lead ACOAs to inspire dependency in their own children. ACOAs’ need for approval can also lead them to overspend or pay beyond their means to please others. Also, many ACOAs had to mature early and assume the responsibilities that the alcoholic parent could not fulfill, which can create an overdeveloped sense of responsibility in ACOAs and contribute to feelings of inadequacy and loss of control.

Finding Help

The depth to which alcoholism affects ACOAs’ daily lives depends on a wide range of variables, from their own personalities and coping skills to the extent to which their parent’s alcoholism affected their early developmental years. All ACOAs can benefit from learning strategies that will help them overcome negative behaviors and chart courses for healthy futures, but no single method works best for everyone. Options include:

Reading. Find the latest books and research, both in print and online, about alcohol abuse and the way it can affect family life.

Talking. Confide in a close friend or family member who can understand your feelings and respect your privacy without judgment.

Counseling. Meet with a psychologist or certified social worker who can help you focus on your future, not the pains of the past. Sometimes talking with a stranger can be more therapeutic than talking with a friend.

Joining. Become a part of a free support group that meets in person or in a private online chat forum to find out how other ACOAs have overcome barriers to happiness. Twelve-step programs, such as Al-Anon and Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACA), can be particularly empowering.

Bibliography

Dayton, Tian. "Adult Children of Alcoholics and Trauma." Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost, 13 Feb. 2015. Web. 27 Oct. 2015.

Ketcham, Katherine, William F. Asbury, Mel Schulstad, and Arthur P. Ciaramicoli. Beyond the Influence: Understanding and Defeating Alcoholism. New York: Bantam, 2000. Print.

Ludwig, Arnold. Understanding the Alcoholic’s Mind: The Nature of Craving and How to Control It. New York: Oxford UP, 1989. Print.

Martin, Scott C. The SAGE Encyclopedia of Alcohol: Social, Cultural, and Historical Perspectives. Thousand Oaks: Sage, 2015. Print.

Miller, William R., and Kathleen M. Carroll, eds. Rethinking Substance Abuse: What the Science Shows, and What We Should Do about It. New York: Guilford, 2010. Print.

Taite, Richard. "6 Signs of Addiction in Adult Children of Alcoholics." Psychology Today. Sussex, 28 Aug. 2015. Web. 27 Oct. 2015.